MY QUALITY TIME: MY QUALITY TIME BLOG #WISDOM #JOKES & #TRAVEL... RAISED CONTAINER GARDENING & MORE... THINGS WISE MEN FEAR... SYLVIA AND WANDA WENT TO HEAVEN... Wuauquikuna

I cannot find the words to say how beautiful this music is. I feel transported to a wonderful & different place in space and time.

MY QUALITY TIME BLOG #WISDOM #JOKES & #TRAVEL

I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so

I sat down and had a cold beer. 

The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking.

My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing,

and I said, "Nothing." 

The reason I said "nothing" instead of saying "just thinking" is because she then would have asked, "About what?"

At that point I would have had to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics, which would lead to other questions.

Finally I pondered an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts?

Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts, but how could they know?

Well, after another beer, and some more heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with an answer to that question.

Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby, and even though I obviously couldn't really know, here is the reason for my conclusion:

A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child."

But you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."

I rest my case.

Time for another beer.  Then maybe a nap.

SYLVIA: Hi! Wanda.

WANDA: Hi! Sylvia.  How'd you die?...

SYLVIA: I froze to death.

WANDA: How horrible!

SYLVIA: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death.  What about you?

WANDA: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

SYLVIA: So, what happened?

WANDA: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking.  I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died.

SYLVIA: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer -- we'd both still be alive.

MY QUALITY TIME BLOG #WISDOM #JOKES & #TRAVEL

Today's Quotes

“It's like everyone tells a story about themselves inside their own head. Always. All the time. That story makes you what you are. We build ourselves out of that story.” 

“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.” 

“It's the questions we can't answer that teach us the most. They teach us how to think. If you give a man an answer, all he gains is a little fact. But give him a question and he'll look for his own answers.” 

“We understand how dangerous a mask can be. We all become what we pretend to be.” 

“Words are pale shadows of forgotten names. As names have power, words have power. Words can light fires in the minds of men. Words can wring tears from the hardest hearts.” 