Andy Dufresne: Get busy living or get busy dying. Andy Dufresne: Remember, Red, hope is a good thing. Maybe the best of things and no good thing ever dies. WISDOM JOKES WISDOM JOKES AT MY QUALITY TIME BLOG WISDOM JOKES
Today's Quotes:::“I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances.”
"I live a very dull life here... indeed I think I am more like a state prisoner than anything else."
"We carry the seeds of happiness with us wherever we go."
"Keep your business affairs in your own hands. It's the only way to be happy."
"I am fond of only what comes from the heart."
― Martha Washington
MY QUALITY TIME BLOG #WISDOM #JOKES & #TRAVEL
A petrol station owner in Ireland was trying to increase his sales, so he put up a sign that read, 'Free Sex with Fill-Up.'
Paddy pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex.
The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10.
If he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex.
Paddy guessed 8, and the proprietor said, 'You were close.
The number was 7. Sorry. No sex this time.'
A week later, Paddy, along with his friend Mick, pulled in for another fill-up. Again he asked for his free sex.
The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess the correct number.
Paddy guessed 2. The proprietor said, 'Sorry, it was 3.
You were close, but no free sex this time.'
As they were driving away, Mick said to Paddy,
'I think that game is rigged and he doesn't really
give away free sex at all.'
Paddy replied, 'No it's genuine enough Mick.
My wife won twice last week. Almost broke my heart.
Bonnie Tyler has released a video all about cardiology. It’s totally clips of the HEART..
If you steal someone’s heart, do you get cardiac arrested?
I used to get heartburn when I ate birthday cake until a doctor advised me to take the candles off first.
MY QUALITY TIME BLOG #WISDOM #JOKES & #TRAVEL
"See I done been LIED , BACKSTABBED and HEARTBROKEN " HEART been BROKE so MANY times dont KNOW what to BELIEVE
x
I say. " Have some ICE CREAM and a GREAT DAY J.T. "
OORAH! Ever look on Heaven's scenes, They will find the streets are guarded By United States Marines.
MY QUALITY TIME BLOG#WISDOM#JOKES & #TRAVEL
Not only can you gain wisdom from quotes but interesting stories will work as well. So here is one for you. (came in and email)
John Guy writes: "What God did at Pearl Harbor that day is interesting and I never knew this little bit of history.
Tour boats ferry people out to the USS Arizona Memorial in Hawaii every thirty minutes. We just missed a ferry and had to wait thirty minutes. I went into a small gift shop to kill time.
In the gift shop, I purchased a small book entitled, "Reflections on Pearl Harbor" by Admiral Chester Nimitz.
Sunday, December 7th, 1941— Admiral Chester Nimitz was attending a concert in Washington, DC. He was paged and told there was a phone call for him. When he answered the phone, it was President Franklin Delano Roosevelt on the phone.
He told Admiral Nimitz that he (Nimitz) would now be the Commander of the Pacific Fleet. Admiral Nimitz flew to Hawaii to assume command of the Pacific Fleet. He landed at Pearl Harbor on Christmas Eve, 1941. There was such a spirit of despair, dejection and defeat--you would have thought the Japanese had already won the war.
On Christmas Day, 1941, Adm. Nimitz was given a boat tour of the destruction wrought on Pearl Harbor by the Japanese. Big sunken battleships and navy vessels cluttered the waters everywhere you looked. As the tour boat returned to dock, the young helmsman of the boat asked, "Well Admiral, what do you think after seeing all this destruction?"
Admiral Nimitz's reply shocked everyone within the sound of his voice. Admiral Nimitz said, "The Japanese made three of the biggest mistakes an attack force could ever make, or God was taking care of America. Which do you think it was?"
Shocked and surprised, the young helmsman asked, "What do mean by saying the Japanese made the three biggest mistakes an attack force ever made?
Nimitz explained:
Mistake number one:
The Japanese attacked on Sunday morning. Nine out of every ten crewmen of those ships were ashore on leave. If those same ships had been lured to sea and been sunk--we would have lost 38,000 men instead of 3,800.
Mistake number two:
When the Japanese saw all those battleships lined in a row, they got so carried away sinking those battleships, they never once bombed our dry docks opposite those ships. If they had destroyed our dry docks, we would have had to tow every one of those ships to America to be repaired. As it is now, the ships are in shallow water and can be raised. One tug can pull them over to the dry docks, and we can have them repaired and at sea by the time we could have towed them to America. And I already have crews ashore anxious to man those ships.
Mistake number three: Every drop of fuel in the Pacific theater of war is in top of the ground storage tanks five miles away over that hill. One attack plane could have strafed those tanks and destroyed our fuel supply.
That's why I say the Japanese made three of the biggest mistakes an attack force could make or, God was taking care of America.
I've never forgotten what I read in that little book. It is still an inspiration as I reflect upon it. In jest, I might suggest that because Admiral Nimitz was a Texan, born and raised in Fredericksburg, Texas -- he was a born optimist.
But any way you look at it -- Admiral Nimitz was able to see a silver lining in a situation and circumstance where everyone else saw only despair and defeatism.
President Roosevelt had chosen the right man for the right job. We desperately needed a leader that could see silver lining in the midst of the clouds of dejection, despair and defeat.
MY QUALITY TIME BLOG #WISDOM #JOKES & #TRAVEL
Army Says: “HOOOOOAH!” Marines Say “OOOOORAH!” Navy and CG Say “HOOOOOYAH!” Air Force Says “OKEY DOKEY?”
What Do You Call a Soldier Who Survived Mustard Gas and Pepper Spray?
– A Seasoned Veteran
How does the Air Force Play Bingo?
B-52 F-16 A-10..
After the losing party refuses to accept election results, a country is teetering on the edge of a civil war.
Armed insurgents invade the capitol, threaten violence and are ultimately overpowered. But intelligence shows that they may be planning another attack.
The country’s leaders ask for advice in how to handle the violence.
The winning party yells “Impeach the outgoing president during his final week in office!”
The losing party pleads for unity while still refusing to concede the election.
One man looks out at the scene of thousands of military troops forced to sleep in the capitol to protect it, heads resting on cold hard floor, and immediately advises the president that we need to call up even more troops and impose martial law.
“And what is your background?” the president asks. “Are you a homeland security expert? Or a military general with experience in revolutions?”
There should be a law passed that enforces these two to do a concert together at least once every year!
MY QUALITY TIME BLOG #WISDOM#JOKES & #TRAVEL
Today's quotes brought to you by Linda. Or should I say Captain Linda
“Shoot for the MOON. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.”
“The way to happiness: Keep your heart free from hate, your mind from worry. Live simply, expect little, give much. Scatter sunshine, forget self, think of others. Try this for a week and you will be surprised.”
“Change your thoughts and you change your world.”
“If you want things to be different, perhaps the answer is to become different yourself.”
"If you have zest and enthusiasm you attract zest and enthusiasm. Life does give back in kind."
“Our happiness depends on the habit of mind we cultivate.”
A mother was concerned about her kindergarten son walking to school.
He didn’t want his mother to walk with him.
She wanted to give him the feeling that he had some independence but yet know that he was safe:
So she had an idea of how to handle it.
She asked a neighbor if she would please follow him to school in the mornings, staying at a distance, so he probably wouldn’t notice her.
She said that since she was up early with her toddler anyway, it would be a good way for them to get some exercise as well, so she agreed.
The next school day, the neighbor and her little girl set out following behind Timmy as he walked to school with another neighbor girl he knew. She did this for the whole week.
As the two kids walked and chatted, kicking stones and twigs, Timmy’s little friend noticed the same lady was following them as she seemed to do every day all week.
Finally, she said to Timmy, ‘Have you noticed that lady following us to school all week? Do you know her?’
Timmy nonchalantly replied, “Yeah, I know who she is.”
The little girl said. “Well, who is she?”
“That’s just Shirley Goodnest,” Timmy replied. “And her daughter Marcy.”
“Shirley Goodnest? Who is she and why is she following us?”
“Well,’ Timmy explained.
“Every night my Mum makes me say the 23rd Psalm with my prayers, ‘cuz she worries about me so much. And in the Psalm, it says,
‘ Shirley Goodnest and Marcy shall follow me all the days of my life’, so I guess I’ll just have to get used to it.”
Posts
